Lead Yourself to Lead Others — Mindset, Time, One Thing, Communication, Emotions

Start here “You can only lead others as much as you have led yourself.” Part 2 has nine lessons. This page covers the first five.

From the slide:

• Overcome adversity (hard times).
• Convert obstacles into opportunities.
• Nurture a positive mindset.
• Use words of power and positivity.
• Recreate your life so that it becomes a recreation in itself.

Lecture example — Prof. Kartic: from board games to digital games He designed board and card games and believed they were the best. He also believed “I cannot design digital games”. So he didn’t even try to understand some customers’ problems. That is a fixed mindset. Weeks and months passed with no work.

Then the pandemic came. People could not meet to play board games. He was forced to go digital. First he just copied board games into digital form. Slowly he learnt that the two worlds are different.

He also broke another belief: “I must do everything alone.” He started partnering with digital game companies. A whole new world opened up.

His shift: from “I know it all, I want quick results” → to “I am here to learn, explore and partner.” Now he works in a zone of learning and possibilities.

In one line: A growth mindset turns “I can’t” into “I can learn” and obstacles into opportunities. Exam words: growth mindset, fixed mindset, limiting belief, adversity, obstacles into opportunities.

Time management alone is not enough. You must also manage your energy.

From the slide:

• Create to-do lists.
• Prioritise your work.
• Make it easy to get started and get it done.
• Do what you love, and love what you do.
• Be aware of energy and time drainers and energy boosters.
• Monitor your energy levels.
• Recharge your energy regularly — for balance, focus, productivity and performance.

Lecture example — Prof. Sivakumar: “I don’t manage time, I manage myself”

• To-do list: writing tasks on paper stops them from nagging his mind.
• Prioritise: what is urgent, what is important.
• Make it easy to start: he put his bike key inside the meeting file, so he couldn’t forget the file. When writing a paper, he stops mid-sentence, so the next day his mind wants to finish it — and he gets into flow.
• Love what you do: many things are not in your hands, so train yourself to love the work you have.
• Recharge: a 45-minute nap (siesta) in the afternoon; meditation in the morning; a short stroll or a little music to break monotony.
• Track energy: use the fresh morning for creative work.

In one line: Manage yourself — plan tasks, make starting easy, and recharge your energy. Exam words: to-do list, prioritise, energy drainers, energy boosters, recharge, love what you do.

Gary Keller’s book The ONE Thing asks two questions:

1. What is the one thing I can do such that doing it makes everything else easier or unnecessary?
2. What must I do right now to be on the path to the big picture — the bullseye?

From the slide:

• Write down your goals, aspirations and dreams.
• Goals support one another, directly or indirectly.
• You will achieve your other goals to reach a big or long-term goal.

Lecture example — Prof. Sivakumar’s one thing: joy Everything he does, he asks: does it connect to joy? Then all goals line up behind it. Goal posts keep moving — after cracking JEE, there was the next goal. So don’t wait for the final moment to be happy. Enjoy each step. His motto: “Enjoy being with joy.”

In one line: Find your one thing, and let your other goals line up behind it. Exam words: the one thing, Gary Keller, goals support each other, bullseye.

Poor communication causes misunderstandings, lost information, rework, and wastes time, energy and money.

From the slide:

• Use words of power.
• Use body language and non-verbal cues.
• Speak so others will listen.
• Listen actively.
• Practise the power of silence and pause.
• Use the power of solitude (time alone) for creative ideas.

Lecture example — Lt Col Jayakumar

• Everything begins and ends with communication — even problems.
• Vocabulary: he kept a 400-page register of new words and looked them up in the dictionary.
• Non-verbal: eyes speak; tone shows your mood.
• Hearing vs listening: hearing is general; listening is done on purpose, absorbing everything. Active listening helps you learn and encourages the speaker to share more.
• Silence also communicates.
• Don’t speak like a fast express train. Use pauses.
• To communicate a task well: (1) know your job, (2) know the other person’s job, (3) understand what both need to achieve. Then list the points and speak.

Prof. Sivakumar: There is a ladder: hearing → listening → feeling → being immersed. Words are like pearls — string them well and you get a beautiful necklace.

In one line: Choose strong words, use pauses and body language, and truly listen. Exam words: words of power, non-verbal cues, active listening, hearing vs listening, silence, pause, solitude.

“Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it’s less good than the one you had before.” — Elizabeth Edwards

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and handle emotions — in yourself and in others. It builds self-awareness and empathy. Employers are often said to value EQ (emotional quotient) over IQ.

From the slide:

• Identify and understand your emotions, their impact and their triggers.
• Process and regulate unwanted emotions; become emotionally resilient.
• Self-awareness helps you recognise, understand and influence others’ emotions too.

Lecture example — Prof. Kartic In school and college, only IQ and marks seemed to matter. You worked alone. At work, you work in teams, and emotions affect everyone’s productivity. He used to get angry and frustrated quickly. With experience and mentors, he learnt to notice these emotions and come back to a calm state. Now his anger is less strong and shorter. When calm, he asks: “What else can I do?” — if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters. How to build self-awareness: self-reflection, mentors, and daily habits like meditation and journaling.

Prof. Sivakumar: People bring a leader both problems and happy news. A good leader balances these very different emotions.

Everyday example Your teammate forgot his part of the project. You feel angry. Instead of shouting in the group chat, you wait 10 minutes, then ask, “What happened? How can we finish it together?” That pause is emotional resilience.

In one line: Notice your emotions, calm yourself, and understand others’ feelings — EQ often matters more than IQ. Exam words: emotional intelligence, EQ vs IQ, self-awareness, triggers, regulate emotions, emotional resilience, journaling.